VaLENTines: Start of Lent on Feb. 14 puts indulgence, abstinence in conflict for some (2024)

Ash Wednesday, the first day of Lent, just so happens to fall on the day of love. While Catholic leaders say they won't give out exemptions, a representative from the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops says the holidays go hand-in-hand with each other.

The Mardi Gras traditions of spending weeks partying and eating king cake all lead up to one day, Ash Wednesday. It's the first day of Lent, the 40-day season, not including Sundays, which leads up to Easter Sunday.

But this year, getting a reservation at the fancy steak house down the street may present a conflict of interest for Roman Catholics.

Father Dustin Dought, the executive director of the Secretariat of Divine Worship of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, told USA Today that it's one of the two days in the year that Roman Catholics are obliged to fast. The other is Good Friday.

"This practice is a way of emptying ourselves so that we can be filled with God," said Dought.

According to Dought, he believes the Church won't give out an exception because Ash Wednesday and Valentine's Day ultimately go together.

The line, "Behold the lamb of God which takes away the sins of the world,” John 1:29, refers to the sacrifice made by God and Jesus.

"The Lord tells us in the Gospels, 'No greater love has a person than this, to lay down his life for his friends,'" said Dought. "So when we think of Valentine's Day, we can think of lots of different things. But the image that Jesus gives us is laying down our lives for another person, and that clarifies what Valentine's Day is about."

VaLENTines: Start of Lent on Feb. 14 puts indulgence, abstinence in conflict for some (2)

The rules of Fasting

The rules for fasting for Roman Catholics are different from those in other faiths that ask believers to abstain for food or drink for extended periods.

"In the Church's directions for fasting, she says [to eat] one regular-sized meal and two smaller meals that don't equal that regular-sized meal," said Dought.

There is no specific portion size set in the rule. Dought says it just depends on the person and their state in life. He says it's "relative."

"A full meal for someone who does very intense bodily work may be different from a full meal for someone who doesn't," said Dought.

According to him, the only Roman Catholics who are obligated to fast are people aged 18 to 59.

What does the start of Lent mean for Valentine's Day plans?

Catholics must abstain from eating meat on Ash Wednesday. But it isn't just Ash Wednesday. It is every Friday during Lent, including Good Friday.

"Since Jesus sacrificed his flesh for us on Good Friday, we refrain from eating flesh meat in his honor on Fridays," says the the Archdiocese of Saint Paul and Minneapolis.

WilliamJohnston, an associate professor of religious studies at the University of Dayton, told USA TODAY that abstaining from eating meat is also a form of penance– admitting to any wrongdoings and sins while turning back to belief in God.

VaLENTines: Start of Lent on Feb. 14 puts indulgence, abstinence in conflict for some (3)

What can Catholics eat while abstaining during Lent?

Catholics might want to trade in the steak house reservation for one at a sushi restaurant.

USA Today reports that on that day, the most popular choice is fish. According to the Archdiocese, the following can be eaten:

  • Fish
  • Shrimp
  • Crab
  • Lobster
  • Shellfish

However, according to Johnson, buying expensive fish is discouraged.

VaLENTines: Start of Lent on Feb. 14 puts indulgence, abstinence in conflict for some (4)

Those who don't have a taste for seafood can opt for non-flesh animal products, like milk, eggs, cheese and butter.

Couples planning to celebrate the night with a bottle of wine don't have to worry.

Some Roman Catholic couples might choose to abstain from alcohol, but the church doesn't require it.

How can fasting be romantic?

Dought says that fasting is always done with an end in mind. People shouldn't just do it to prove that they can and turn it into a competition. It should be done "out of love for God and of my neighbor."

Someone who fasts on Valentine's Day and eats those smaller portions can save the one regular meal they get that day and look forward to sharing it with their partner. Dought believes that kind of sacrifice and love could enrich Valentine's.

"Fasting is not just about 'me,' but about 'us,'" he said. "So, I think Valentine's Day can clarify what Ash Wednesday is really about, and Ash Wednesday can clarify what Valentine's Day is really about."

He goes on to say that someone who keeps their partner in mind when they practice fasting doesn't just ignite a love for God, but a love for their partner, too.

Contributing: Jordan Mendoza, USA Today

VaLENTines: Start of Lent on Feb. 14 puts indulgence, abstinence in conflict for some (2024)

FAQs

Why do we do abstinence during Lent? ›

There are lots of reasons for fasting during the season of Lent—an effort to join in Christ's suffering, detaching ourselves from worldly things, making more room for God in our lives, practicing holy habits that will help us grow in virtue—the list goes on.

What is the rule for abstinence in Lent? ›

What are the Lent rules on abstinence? In this context, abstinence refers to “abstaining” from meat on Fridays during Lent. Whereas Catholics fast on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday with just one large meal, Catholics must refrain from eating meat on other Fridays, though they can have three full meals.

Why is Valentine's day on Feb. 14? ›

The 8th-century Gelasian Sacramentary recorded the celebration of the Feast of Saint Valentine on February 14. The day became associated with romantic love in the 14th and 15th centuries, when notions of courtly love flourished, apparently by association with the "lovebirds" of early spring.

What is abstinence food during Lent? ›

A summary of current practice: On Ash Wednesday, Good Friday, and all Fridays of Lent: Everyone of age 14 and up must abstain from consuming meat. On Ash Wednesday and Good Friday: Everyone of age 18 to 59 must fast, unless exempt due to usually a medical reason.

What are examples of Lent abstinence? ›

Abstinence means not eating meat, such as poultry, beef, and pork. Fish, meat-based broths, eggs, butter, and other animal-derived products are allowed.

Is it a sin to eat meat on Fridays during Lent? ›

One key aspect of Lent will be observed as usual this year, said the Rev. Patrick Riviere, director of the diocese's Office of the Priesthood. “Yes, it's a sin to eat meat on Fridays during Lent,” Riviere said. “The Church does ask Catholics to abstain from eating meat on Fridays during Lent.”

What are the three rules of Lent? ›

The three traditional pillars of Lent are prayer, fasting and almsgiving. Through the three pillars of Lent we journey to develop a closer relationship to God. The 40 days of Lent should be filled with reflection, service and prayer.

What happens if a Catholic eat meat on Friday? ›

“Each Friday during Lent is actually referred to as Days of Penance,” the 33-year-old said. “If someone unintentionally eats meat by accident without willfully knowing they've done wrong, it's not a sin. I usually suggest they make sure to sacrifice something else in its place to make up for eating meat.”

Who decided February 14th is Valentine's day? ›

At the end of the 5th century, Pope Gelasius declared February 14 St. Valentine's Day, and since then, February 14th has been a day of celebration—though it was generally more religious than romantic.

What is the real story behind Valentine's day? ›

Saint Valentine was discovered and imprisoned in a torture-ridden Roman jail, where he fell in love with a mysterious girl (believed to be his prosecutor's daughter). He sent her a love letter signed 'from your Valentine' right before his execution, thus originating the romantic sign-off still widely used today.

What is the dark history of Valentine's day? ›

One Valentine was a priest in third-century Rome who defied Emperor Claudius II after the ruler outlawed marriage for young men. St. Valentine would perform marriages in secret for young lovers, ultimately leading to his death.

Can Catholics over age 65 eat meat on Fridays during Lent? ›

No. All Catholics abstain from meat on Ash wednesday & all Fridays of Lent. Catholics over 59 are exempt from the days of Fasting, which are Ash Wednesday & all Fridays of Lent. All Catholics abstain from meat on Ash wednesday & all Fridays of Lent.

What did Jesus eat on Lent? ›

Lent in the New Testament

All three accounts say that Jesus went without food for the 40 days. Christians, like adherents to many other religions, have long fasted.

What foods are forbidden in Catholicism? ›

Traditional Catholics don't eat meat on Friday but any other day of the week eating meat is fine. But there are no taboo foods for Catholics. Catholics abstain from eating meat on Fridays of Lent (6 weeks before Easter) and they fast as well on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday.

Do you have to fast all 40 days of Lent? ›

As many know, Ash Wednesday, Good Friday and Fridays during Lent are obligatory days of fasting and abstinence. In addition to these specific days, Catholics of age are also invited to fast from food or worldly pleasures in order to deepen their hunger and desire for Christ.

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